There You'll Be, Buffy...
by epiphanies
Summary: Post-Gift. Spike is pensive. I think it's sweet. I wrote it ages ago. :)


There You'll Be

A Buffy Songfic

When I think back 

On these times 

And the dreams

We left behind 

I''ll be glad 'cause I was blessed 

To have you in my life 

  
  


Spike looked down at her gravestone and shed a silent tear as he lay flowers on the ground beneath it.

This would have been the day, mate. That day that you had so looked forward for.

I killed her. Just as well as did, anyways. I let her down. 

How could I do that?

I really am a monster. 

  
  


When I look back 

On these days

I''ll look and see your face

You were right there for me

In my dreams 

  
  


I still can't really believe that you're gone, Summers.

I mean, you're- I mean, was the Slayer. You weren't supposed to die.

I mean, you think I'm gonna let you off that easy? When I actually thought I had a truce with you? I mean, that was the first time that we actually got along. You knew that I loved you, and you knew that you didn't love me. But we became friends. We both knew that. We had the best friendship/relationship that we had ever had, and then you had to go and bleeding die on me.

Where's the fairness in that, huh Slayer?

  
  


I''ll always see your soul 

Above the sky 

In my heart 

There always be a place 

For you for all my life

  
  


You don't want to know about how the others are taking this. I mean, I don't have a "soul" and here I am, sitting at the Slayer's gravestone crying my bleeding eyes out. How do you think the humans are taking it? Especially Platelet. She's not good. But I said that I wouldn't tell you, so I won't. 

How can this be, Buffy?

How can you be gone forever?

I mean.........you're a Slayer. You're not supposed to die.....not unless you had a death wish...and Buffy really! You weren't supposed to take me seriously! I was just trying to freak you out, you know? Make that cute little lip tremble? You can't be...No. You're not dead. No.

  
  


I''ll keep a part 

Of you with me 

And everywhere I am

There you''ll be 

Well you showed me 

How it feels 

To feel the sky 

Within my reach 

And I always 

Will remember all

The strength you

Gave to me 

  
  


Buffy....I truly don't know how long or how much I've loved you. All I know is that if it isn't love that's making me sob in anger and frustration that the Slayer is dead, what in the bleeding hell is it?

Maybe I should stop swearing...and smoking....that could help me get into where you are, Buffy.

Well, hope and faith is what humans have that help them get there right?

But I'm not human.

Damn I hate this. 

  
  


Your love made me 

Make it through 

Oh, I owe so much to you 

You were right there for me 

In my dreams 

I''ll always see your soul 

Above the sky 

In my heart 

There always be a place

For you for all my life 

  
  


Buffy, please come back. 

I need you- we all do.

Actually, don't.

Maybe you'll get your wish...maybe I'll get over this little infatuation.

Or not.

  
  


I''ll keep a part 

Of you with me 

And everywhere I am 

There you''ll be

  
  


You're in my dreams every nigh- day. I can't even sleep most of the time, but when I do, I always wake up to the realization that you're gone.

I know that everyone else feels quite the same but.....

I love you.

Still.

I really, truly do, and there's nothing that you or God or any of the Scoobies can do about it.

Oh well, that talk is a real way to win your heart.

Your unbeating heart.

See, if I didn't love you and this was an infatuation, then I would dig you up myself and sire you to be the hottest vampire in this century.

But no.

I have to love you.

  
  


'Cause I always saw in you 

My light, my strength 

And I want to thank you 

Now for all the ways

You were right there for me 

You were right there for me 

  
  


See, I don't get that concept.

That I love you so I never get to see you again, and if I didn't then I would be able to bring you back (in a very cold, evil bloodless way but still...)

What I would give to have you back....

Nothing.

As much as I want you back, Buffy....I know you're happy.

Happy in heaven up there with Mum and all the past slayers.

Maybe you'll have tea parties.

  
  


For always 

In my dreams

I''ll always see your soul

Above the sky

In my heart 

There always be a place

For you for all my life 

  
  


He knelt down and kissed the grey tombstone.

"I love you, Buffy Anne Summers. You were the best at everything you did, and you were the most beautiful image my undead eyes have ever seen. Never forget how much everyone loved you, Buffy. Especially me."

Then, the heartbroken vampire lay down the flowers, stood up, blinded by tears and walked out of the graveyard.

  
  


I''ll keep a part

Of you with me

And everywhere I am 

There you''ll be 


End file.
